Time: Wed, 02-Jan-2002 02:15:48 GMT     IP: 24.4.252.101


Herman Melville had a tattoo on his penis. Encircling, a snake 
devouring its own tail. Atop its head, the Star of David. 

It is well known that silent film star Clara Bow once slept with 
the entire UCLA football team. What is less well known is that 
the same year, Eleanor Roosevelt slept with the entire New York 
Stock Exchange's Board of Directors, for much different reasons. 

When William Faulkner was sixteen, he pulled his cousin Jonathan 
behind a shed and asked him if they could run away together. 
Jonathan knelt down and unbuttoned William Faulkner's trousers. 
With his penknife, he cut a slash across his tongue, and another 
across the tip of William Faulkner's penis. He took William 
Faulkner's penis into his mouth and began to cry. He leaped up, 
kissed William Faulkner, and said- "Now we're married for 
forever." He ran across the field. William Faulkner was impotent 
for the rest of his life!

F. Scott Fitzgerald met Ernest Hemingway in 1926, in Paris.  
They were both fresh from trips to Rome, and discovered a mutual 
admiration of the new Italian dictator, Mussolini. In a 
whorehouse on the Left Bank, they heard a man shouting in 
Italian at the bartender. Hemingway punched him. Fitzgerald 
drank his whiskey. When the man stood up, he threatened to put a 
knife in Hemingway's gut. Fitzgerald coughed delicately and 
suggested that if murder was his intention, perhaps he should 
buy another round of this abominable rotgut. After a short 
pause, all three roared with laughter. That man was Ezra Pound, 
and he initiated both Hemingway and Fitzgerald into the Fascist 
spy network in the United States. However, Hemingway renounced 
his Fascist beliefs after touring Spain in 1937. He returned to 
the United States in 1940 and published For Whom The Bell Tolls. 
He divorced his wife Pauline Pfeiffer, who was a member of the 
Nazi underground. In disguise, he flew to California and 
confronted the drunken Fitzgerald in his Hollywood home. 
Fitzgerald could only mumble- "This world's rotten to the core. 
Pound's right, let's burn it all down. Let's start over. Oh God, 
let's just start over and this time, it'll be honest. So awful, 
but yes, yes, honest." Hemingway cut his wrists open and bled 
him over the bathtub. The police declared it suicide, but 
Zelda's money made it a heart attack for the papers. Hemingway's 
last words? "Yes. Honest."

Time: Tue, 08-Jan-2002 00:29:03 GMT     IP: 209.56.60.2

Is anyone else kept awake at night by the mysterious pencil 
drawing of Kyle Lange reproduced on the last page of the liner 
notes to Sean Lennon's "Into the Sun"?

Time: Wed, 23-Jan-2002 09:54:29 GMT     IP: 172.173.91.75

Apologies for the recent problems with the No Shame 
message boards.  Unfortunately, there appears to be little 
that we can do about it.  The message board software is not 
under our direct control so there are only a very few 
adjustments we can make.

Almost everything on the No Shame web site is free or 
donated, and as such, we sometimes get what we paid for.

It appears that the Beseen company, from which we have 
obtained our boardrooms, is currently upgrading its bulletin 
board software, and this may be the source of most of the 
recent problems.

All I can suggest is that if you are unable to post to the 
message board, try again in a couple days or post to the 
ISCA Bulletin Board which appears to be a much more 
reliable resource (though you will need set up your account 
first.)

Sincerely,

Jeff Goode
No Shame web master

Time: Thu, 24-Jan-2002 05:56:29 GMT     IP: 205.244.160.104

The first No Shame of the semenester will be on February the 
1st.  Please come.  Please bring a dollar.  Please don't 
complain should anyone happen to take off their clothes.

Aaron

Time: Wed, 30-Jan-2002 20:15:16 GMT     IP: 128.255.202.75

The band I'm in (My Business Failed in Three Weeks) is having a 
show. Here are the details:

MY BUSINESS FAILED IN THREE WEEKS
opening for FORGIVING ISCARIOT
GABE'S OASIS
THURSDAY, JANUARY 31st
9pm
$5

Our debut album will also be on sale at the show for $5 (if 
you're interested in that sort of thing).

You should come.  Please.


Also... this semester, I got a new radio show called "The ABCs 
of KRUI" where I'll be playing the entire KRUI music library 
from A to Z. What a novel, gimmick-heavy idea, you say?  Yes. 
Yes, it is.

It's Wednesdays from 5pm to 7pm on KRUI 89.7 FM. On the show, 
I'll be performing scripts I've written.  Perhaps you 
will "enjoy" these "scripts" and "laugh?"  Probably not, but 
you might as well give it a chance.

This is the end of my ugly bit of self-publicity. 
(Note: By admitting to it, I am forgiven)
  

Time: Thu, 31-Jan-2002 03:19:11 GMT     IP: 205.244.161.114

Comin atcha from tha text only browser.  In tha old days, crazy stuff happened when I posted here from Lynx.  Lesee if luck still holdz!  Over here tha Bulletin Board seems to be working.
A man walks into a pub and says ouch.

Time: Thu, 31-Jan-2002 04:33:58 GMT     IP: 128.255.202.194

The three photos I took of the audience from the stage last 
semester are up on my website.  The URL for the page is:

www.envy.nu/internetsite/pictures.html  

One picture is from the show on October 26, the other two from 
BONS on December 14.  Highlights include the facial expressions 
in the first row in the first picture, Neil Campbell's 
enthusiastic double-flipping-of-the-bird in the second, and 
Alyssa Bowman's mysterious hand gestures in the third.  My site 
has been down frequently for the last few days, although I think 
it's doing much better now, so the pictures should be there.

Time: Thu, 31-Jan-2002 15:09:53 GMT     IP: 172.132.52.250

Can anyone identify this photo (printed in the fall issue of the 
Liberal Arts alumni magazine)?

     http://www.noshame.org/iowacity/pix/011012.jpg

It looks like it could be from "Sir Chan Destroy".  Or perhaps 
another piece later in the same night?

...Jeff

Time: Thu, 31-Jan-2002 15:57:22 GMT     IP: 128.255.179.87

This picture was also in the Parent Times my mom recieved over 
break. She saw the picture and was like, "is that what you do on 
Friday nights?". It looks as though Nick is seated in the front 
row of the far section of the theatre, near Willie, so I don't 
think it was Nick's piece.

Speaking of pictures, my photos I took during BONS should be 
scanned soon and I will send them on to the website.

Time: Thu, 31-Jan-2002 17:15:23 GMT     IP: 216.248.99.3

At first glance, it looks a bit like Steve Heuertz. But under 
closer examination, it turns out to be Matt Goolsby. 

I think he only performed once that semester, a 7.5 
called 'Porno Bucket', [M makes sounds and rhythms and shouts; 
sound performance], the same night as Sir Chan Destroy's 
original premiere. 

Boylyssa

Time: Thu, 31-Jan-2002 18:48:35 GMT     IP: 216.243.220.117

It is indeed the redoubtable Matthew Goolsby, in mid 'chka chka'.

Tomorrow, you goddamn reprobates.