copyright © 1999 Dan Brooks

Dan Brooks

4/16/99

"Anthony’s Poem"

Lights up. Lights down.

I’m having one of those rainy days where you can feel arms on the back of your neck.

What? That’s the first line of my poem. "I’m having one of those rainy days where you can feel arms on the back of your neck." The fuck, what does it mean? You know, it’s like when it’s. . .raining. You know when it’s raining and you get all cold, and you wish you had something you could put like right here [gesture to shoulder/neck area]? It’s. . .damp and shit.

Because if I said, "I’m having one of those rainy days where it’s damp" it would sound gay. Oh, for Christ’s sakes, shut up about your cousin already. We all know your cousin’s gay. Fuck off, it’s the way I talk. Look, does it piss you off? When I say "damp" is gay or the Knicks are gay, does it hurt you personally? [Cutting him off] Nah– does it hurt you? All right then. When your fucking cousin comes to visit I’ll say the Knicks are lame. Jesus. You know, you’re one hypocritical motherfucker. Yeah, that’s what I’m sayin’. Uh-huh, just ’cause you ride me about sayin’ things are gay. You say "gypped". Just yesterday you were sayin’ how you got gypped out of overtime at work. ’Cause it comes from "gypsy," that’s why. My great-grandpa was a fuckin’ gypsy. Yeah, it’s true. You think I’m making it up? They put him in the fuckin’ camps and everything. My mother’s grandpa. Fuckin’ gypsy, all the way.

’Cause that’s the way I wanna start my poem. All right? Well, it means somethin’ to me. It’s like – okay, say you gotta walk home in the rain. I don’t know, it’s in the fuckin’ shop. No, she’s gotta work. Look, just say you feel like walkin’ home in the rain, because you want to understand what I mean when my poem says, "I’m having one of those rainy days where you can feel arms on the back of your neck." Shit. Okay, so you walk home in the rain and what’s the first thing you wanna do when you get back to your apartment. You wanna go see Sheila, right? No she’s home. I know I said she was at work – I was just trying to get you to agree with me that you were walking home in the rain. So you get home and Sheila’s there, and she’s sitting on the couch, and the first thing you want to do is sit down next to her and take her arm and put it on the back of your neck, right where the rain’s been dripping off your hair and down into your collar the whole way home. That’s what that line in my poem means.

Or like this. Say you’re at home, the radiator’s on, the windows are open just a crack, it’s been pouring down rain all fuckin’ day. Sheila walks in the door. She’s drenched, except for her hair ’cause she’s been wearing a hat. But the bottom of her hair, the little bit right here at the nape of her neck – that’s wet, ’cause the hat didn’t cover it. So she sits down next to you and you put your hand on the back of her neck, and you take your thumb and you run it back and forth in the wet part of her hair. Bang, right there, you’re in love with her, right? That’s what I’m fuckin’ talking about.

Look, maybe it doesn’t make sense to you because you got that. Sheila comes home at night, it’s been raining, her hair’s wet, you put your hand in it, you’re in love you have a beer what the fuck’s it mean to you? But this is my poem, you know? And I don’t got that. I ain’t got no Sheila to come home wet.

Yo, shut the fuck up. I’m telling you about my fuckin’ poem and you gotta go be crude. Jesus Christ. You know what I’m gonna call this when I’m done? Anthony’s Poem. ’Cause it don’t mean nothin’ to you or probably anybody else who reads it, but it means something to me. Here, look. [Takes out Sharpie, writes "Anthony’s Poem" on paper." Anthony’s Poem. It doesn’t say Bobby DeMolio’s Poem That He Can Criticize The Lines On and Shit, does it? No. It’s Anthony’s Poem, end of discussion.

Beat.

It’s a good fuckin’ line, Bobby. What do you know, anyway?

BLACKOUT.

"Anthony's Poem" IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR

"Anthony's Poem" debuted April 16, 1999.

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