worn-out chicken blues
by John Shirley
Announcer (as flatly as possible):
And now, ladies and gentlemen, Club Indigo presents Reginald, the Rejected Rooster.
The announcer offers some half-hearted applause as lights (preferably blue) come up slowly on Reginald, a washed-up jazz club chicken, who takes a half-smoked cigarette from his mouth and grinds it out on the floor with his right foot, then clears his throat.
Reginald:
Thank you, (insert name of actor playing the announcer), thank you so much.
Reginald waits for the announcer to leave the stage, noisily clears his throat again, coughs loudly, takes a swig of something from a nearby table, gargles and swallows, and then begins to, um, sing BADLY but with a defined rhythm.
Daddy was a rooster;
mama was a hen;
bothathemd a-pity
the shape that im in.
I sing the worn-out chicken blues.
My feathers are ruffled,
and my comb is drooped;
baby, lemme tell ya
that this bird is pooped!
I sing the worn-out chicken blues.
(chorus)
I sing the
worn-out chicken,
worn-out chicken,
worn-out chicken blues
Im startin to go bald,
and my neck is stiff;
dont know how much longer
I can deal with this.
I sing the worn-out chicken blues.
My poor legs are tired,
and my knees are weak;
my back is achin, and
I got a sore beak.
I sing the worn-out chicken blues.
(repeat chorus)
a-chick, a-chick, a-worn-out-chicken,
a-chick, a-chick, a-worn-out-chicken,
a-chick, a-chick, a-worn-out-chicken blues
My old wings are ragged,
and its hard to fly;
all the pretty young hens
just walk right on by.
I sing the worn-out chicken blues.
It feels like my feet are
stuck in a mire;
feels like Im headed for
the chicken fryer!
I sing the worn-out chicken blues.
(repeat chorus)
My mind will, but my body wont.
My cock-a-doodle-do just dont!
I sing the worn-out chicken blues.
(repeat chorus)
I sing the
worn-out chicken,
worn-out chicken,
worn-out chicken bloo
ooo ooo ooo ooo
ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo
ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo
ooos
Yeah. Yeah, whatever.
Lights down quickly.
"worn-out chicken blues" IS COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL AND MAY NOT BE DOWNLOADED, TRANSMITTED, PRINTED OR PERFORMED WITHOUT THE EXPRESS PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR
"worn-out chicken blues" debuted March 8, 2003, performed by John Shirley and Carie Marguerite Donnelson.Performed at No Shame Charlottesville on April 18, 2003. Performed by John Shirley.